I caught my son looking at me the other day. I was guilty. I knew it, but I’m not sure he did. I had just responded rather impatiently to my wife. He was watching. Saw every move. Heard every word.
Recently, I have noticed how much my son looks at me. I don’t always catch it amid the daily activity of family life. But as I look back at pictures, I see it everywhere.
The other night, he put one of my shoes on and proudly tromped around the living room for at least twenty minutes. Every time his little foot slipped out, with determination, he put it right back in and said, “Ah, oh!”
The Scariest Thing on Earth
It scares me to realize how much he shadows me. Not that I don’t enjoy his presence. I love that! But I know myself. I know the way I hurt people, my selfishness and impatience. And I know that my son will reciprocate what I display to him.
How do I instill character in him when I am weak in character, myself? How can I, with all my faults, display to him the love and grace of Jesus Christ?
Dr. Larry Crabb says in his book The Silence of Adam
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“A godly father is a man who understands what he means to his children, who is humbled by overwhelming joy over the impact he can make for God and terrified by the damage he can do. He is both thrilled and scared.”
That’s me: thrilled and scared. I know the impact of a father; I have one. I know the power a father has to call his son into manhood and impart belief in him as a leader. I know how quickly a father can unintentionally wound his son and because of that, my confidence is fragile. Where do I find the ability to leave a positive impact?
How to Leave A Lasting, Positive Impression
Dr. Crabb goes on to say,
“A godly father is a man of faith whose sorrows, though deep and abiding, don’t eliminate joy (at least not for long), whose failures are never used to justify hardness, whose struggles, which tempt him to quit, never overcome him. Without knowing it, a godly father’s countenance occasionally glows. Not many see it, but a few are dazzled by the brightness of his passion for Christ. A passion that reduces those who watch to awe… When he learns that his life has deeply encouraged his son to walk the same path, he is surprised—and grateful. He is caught off guard when people speak warmly of his influence. He is so consumed with Christ’s glory that he hasn’t noticed that a little of it has rubbed off on him.”
“He is so consumed with Christ’s glory…”
I must admit, I’m not consumed with Christ’s glory. I spend more time trying to figure out how to do it right than being consumed with Christ’s glory.
I read books to figure out child training; and get angry when it doesn’t work like they say it should. There have been so many times that I’m brought to my knees because my son consistently disobeys and I try to consistently train him—yet, it seems to make no difference.
But if Dr. Crabb is right, being a godly father has little to do with getting the training just right and more to do with being consumed with Christ’s glory.
Only the power of the Holy Spirit working in my life and my son’s life will enable me to train him effectively. The more I come before the Lord and develop that relationship, the more powerfully I display the character of Christ to my children.
That’s what I want my son to see: the character of Christ. I don’t want him to see me responding impatiently to his Mom. I want him to see me loving her.
What did you see your Dad do that most powerfully displayed Christ? Share in the comments by clicking here.
Authors Recommendation:
If you have never read the book The Silence of Adam: becoming men of courage in a world of chaos, I recommend you do. I found out it convicting, healing, and equipping in being an engaged and active man in my world as a son, as a husband and father, and as a man in society. You can get it on Amazon by clicking here
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