So, when a guy struggles with pornography or masturbation, does he struggle because his sexuality is so strong? Does he desire sex too much? Could it be that his sexual desires are actually too weak?
Spiritual Formation
Articles that address the process of being conformed to the image of Jesus Christ for the glory of God and for the sake of others (II Corinthians 3:17-18).
God Isn’t Good
As the serpent got Adam and Eve to disobey God by wounding their confidence in His goodness, so he gets us to disobey God by wounding our confidence in Him. All addictions, and particularly sexual addictions, exist because deep in our hearts we believe God isn’t good.
What We Do With Our Shame
Everyone, to a certain degree, is looking for a place to belong, a sense of self-worth, and confidence in his ability to do something well. And I believe Adam and Eve experienced that perfectly in the Garden of Eden.
But they lost their perfect sense of security because they believed the lie suggesting God didn’t have their best in mind, that He was holding out on them. They grabbed fig leaves to cover their shame, and in the same way, we grab a sort of fig leaf or mask to prevent others from seeing us for who we really are.
Why You Find It Hard to Control Your Sexual Desires
For years, I was afraid of beautiful women, of ever being alone with someone I felt attracted to. I feared I would not be able to control my desires for her. And what if I was married and a woman tried proposing to me or seducing me? Could I stand strong, or would I give in?
Is Freedom from Porn Possible in a Sexual Age?
My wife was once asked by another young wife, whose husband was looking at porn, if all men struggle with it, if pornography something women just need to get used to.
That question burdens me, and is the primary motivation for my writing. Because we as men don’t have to be addicted to this stuff. We can be free. And when we become free, we realize just how powerful, meaningful, and good our sexuality really is.
Why You Lie to Your Friends about How You’re Really Doing
One of the keys to freedom from porn is connecting with others, being ruthlessly honest with them. As long as I am connecting with people who love me, love Truth, and have the guts to stick with me through thick and thin and confront me when needed, I find increased victory.
But even if I know I am not the only one struggling with porn, if nothing seems to work in helping me get free I still won’t talk with others about my failures. Let me explain what I mean.
Lust Isn’t Just a Man’s Problem
The last few articles I’ve been releasing mini glimpses into the content of my upcoming book Live Free – making sense of male sexuality. The book is a conversation about my own journey and what it means to live sexually whole and free as a man. This book is for men, by a man.
But I wanted to pause and acknowledge that lust isn’t just a man’s problem. Women struggle with it too.
You Are Not the Only Man Struggling with Lust
I sat in a circle of guys sharing about moral struggles and wondered if I had done and seen things others hadn’t. Was I worse? Was I messed up in a way nobody else was? These guys weren’t being too specific about the way they “faced temptations” or “struggled with thoughts,” and my life was very specific about horrible things. I felt hopeless, afraid to be honest with others. But when I started sharing my story, I found out I wasn’t the only one. Neither are you. Here’s how I know.
The Day Every Man Wishes He Could Undo
Every man who has stumbled into pornography wishes he could undo that day. That is, he wishes he could rid himself of the guilt and shame he feels, the inability to look people in the eyes without having anything to hide. I know what it’s like. I’ve been there. This is my story. Only, it’s simply part of my story–just the beginning. It’s the part that must be told if you are going to believe me when I say victory is possible.
Is Masturbation Wrong for Christians?
Masturbation is one of those topics where there isn’t one easy answer for everyone. I want to be careful in writing about masturbation that I don’t cause unnecessary struggle for anyone, but I believe part of finding sexual freedom and healing is understanding our bodies and how they work and what causes us to do certain things. If we never talk about masturbation, it can actually cause people to forever wrestle with lust.
Is masturbation wrong? Well, read more to find out!
10 Bold Predictions about the Millennial Generation of Anabaptists
The generation before us laid the groundwork for rethinking the way we do church—the way we do life, really. Because of our parents, many of us are free to question the status quo. We are free to revisit the methodology of church, romance, family, discipleship, and with that revisiting, comes radical possibilities. Some good, some not good.
Millennials, Community, and Judging One Another
Question Submitted: Where do we separate judging from judging? That was not a typo. Proverbs talks about “iron sharpening iron” and yet people crouch behind Matthew 7:1. And so, how do we separate the two and what are ways to confront issues such as this?
If I understand your question correctly, you are asking “how do we speak into each other’s lives without being accused of judging?” Anymore, if someone raises a concern about something a brother or sister says or does, that brother or sister takes the concern as judgment, right? Yet, does that mean we are not ever to address issues we see in other people’s lives?
