Romance & Family

Posts specifically focusing on romance and family.

Why Marriage Won’t Solve Your Problem with Lust (and what will)

By Asher Witmer Personal Wholeness, Romance & Family
couple in conflict

Lust isn’t just a man’s problem. It’s a human problem. Furthermore, lust isn’t the fact that you desire sexual intimacy. That desire is good and God-given.

If you’ve been following the posts on lust and desire, than you know that single men and women aren’t necessarily lusting when they desire something that can only be satisfied in marriage. On the other hand, married men and women could be lusting when they want what can be satisfied, but their wanting it is self-focused and not motivated by love.

In other words, burning with passion may not be wrong and fulfilling sexual intimacy could be. That means many of us may not fully understand 1 Corinthians 7.

Read More

5 Ways My Son Teaches Me How to Be a Better Dad

By Asher Witmer Romance & Family

Two years ago today, my son popped into open air after sixteen hours of labor. What a thrilling moment! And relieving for my wife. We were excited about this new thing called parenting and raising a family together. Kenaz started sleeping through the night quite easily. Around twelve weeks without much difficulty, he slept nine hours […]

Read More

10 Sure-Fire Ways to Ruin Emotional Intimacy with Your Wife

By Asher Witmer Romance & Family
couple disconnected

Teresa and I have had a few fights. We’ve never thrown things at each other. Just words. Actually, it surprised me how soon into our marriage we struggled with this.

I think I thought we had figured everything out in our courtship. I considered myself a pretty caring and sensitive man. But I had yet to learn the relational habits that lead to emotional disaster.

Guys, if you want to guarantee conflict with your wife, you need be sure and practice these simple principles as often as possible. They will eat away at any connection the two of you have and create a wall of silence and frustration.

Read More

You Don’t Have to Hide Your Pain

By Asher Witmer Personal Wholeness, Romance & Family

If you have ever watched the movie Ragamuffin, you know it is based on the life of singer Rich Mullins. Rich was raised on a farm and was expected to take over the farm when he grew up since he was the oldest in the family.

However, Rich never enjoyed farm work and struggled to learn the ropes. His Dad drank a lot and beat him when he made mistakes. He told Rich that he would never amount to anything.

As a result, Rich spent much of his life trying to prove himself, trying to gain the love and affection of his Dad. When he discovered that he would never receive approval from him, he took that desire to a girl. When she left him, he about went crazy. He felt that everything he touched came apart.

Read More

What You Mean to Those Who Watch

By Asher Witmer Romance & Family

I caught my son looking at me the other day. I was guilty. I knew it, but I’m not sure he did. I had just responded rather impatiently to my wife. He was watching. Saw every move. Heard every word. Recently, I have noticed how much my son looks at me. I don’t always catch […]

Read More

3 Unrealistic Expectations I Had of Parenting

By Asher Witmer Romance & Family

One of my greatest joys in life is parenting. I love my sons. I love working with my wife to raise our boys. But I’ve been realizing that I have unrealistic expectations of what good parenting is.

Lately I’ve noticed an underlying sense of anger. Little things get me all riled up inside, like my son pulling out the dishes for the fifth time of the day or repeatedly emptying the laundry basket. I wasn’t sure where the frustration was coming from, but it was killing me.

The other day I was reflecting on this issue, knowing something had to change but not sure what to do, or even what the problem was. Then I had a thought and I think it came from God: I have unrealistic expectations of what parenting is like. And those expectations are killing me.

Read More

Love, Hate, and the Sacred Marriage

By Asher Witmer Resources & Reviews, Romance & Family

Marriage is intense! The overpowering sensations of finally marrying the lady you love is enough to make the most pragmatic guy lose his balance. But why don’t those feelings last forever? What causes the thrill of it all fade within a few months?

Yesterday, my wife and I celebrated our second anniversary. That’s not a long time, but there are days it feels like a miracle that we made it this far.

I remember within a few weeks after our wedding—after I ambitiously committed to gently loving my wife forever—getting so frustrated with her. It surprised me. Sure, I knew we’d bump into differences at some point, but what shocked me most was how soon I had evil thoughts about her.

Read More