Perhaps you get uneasy when anyone starts talking about missions and supporting missionaries. People place guilt on you for not giving more funds or they condemn you for not being on the field yourself.
I apologize if that’s been your experience. Three things everyone must know about missions are:
- Missionaries are normal people
- Being on the “foreign field” does not make you holier
- Just because you’re “at home” doesn’t mean you’re disobeying God
In fact, I believe the most overlooked aspect of missions is the role of the sender. The sender doesn’t go “on the field”; he stays home. But his role is that of support and empowerment to missionaries.
John Piper says,
“There are three kinds of people: the goers, the senders, and the disobedient.”
The goers literally pack up their bags and go while senders give financially, support in prayer, cheer them on from afar. The disobedient, however, are those that don’t give much thought to the Great Commission at all.
Senders are incredibly needed. People who take seriously the work others are doing and support them are valuable in spreading the Gospel. But there’s an aspect to missions that sender’s don’t seem to realize. That’s the missionary’s children.
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Two Things You Don’t Know
There are two things you don’t know about missionary children, but need to know if you’re going to be an effective sender.
- They probably don’t share their parents vision
- You don’t support them enough
As good as it is to have the whole family on the same page, it doesn’t mean something is broken if the children don’t share their parents’ vision. God calls parents to lead their families—not follow them. But as a sender, you need to give the children active support, as well. Understanding that not everyone may be as thrilled to be in missions as the parents are.
I moved with my family to “the mission field” when I was seventeen years old. I literally left everything I knew. I saw God directing us. I expressed true willingness to move. I couldn’t deny the way He led. But I still didn’t really want to go.
Some missionaries get to go with other families. We didn’t. Many don’t. I went from regularly getting together with friends to having no friends to get together with at all.
While I saw God leading us to move onto the field, I didn’t share the same vision for being there. I missed my friends. I missed the familiar things. And worse of all, hardly anyone recognized it. People applauded us for making such a move. But few dared to enter our world and understand the difficulties of being there.
That’s why it resonated with me when we got asked to teach school in Thailand. It’s a small school, but every child in my class is in Thailand not of their own choosing. Sure, they enjoy the adventure of living in a foreign country. And they’ve gotten used to following God as a family. But they miss their friends back home. Every single one of them. A part of them wishes they could live a “normal” life.
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Most people don’t know that. Or if they do, they forgot. The parents get support, but the children are usually overlooked. Maybe people think if they support the parents they are supporting the whole family. But that’s not how the children feel. They need personal support, as well.
There are four simple ways you, as a sender, can more effectively support missionary kids:
1. Pray for them
Perhaps it’s cliché, but prayer truly is the most important thing you can do for anyone. It doesn’t stop here, but it certainly starts here.
How often do you specifically pray for the children of missionaries you know? There were a couple of people I knew who were praying for me, personally, when my family moved to Los Angeles. That meant the world to me! And here’s the catch, they were the only ones who kept in regular contact.
We often throw “I’m praying for you” out as a word of encouragement, but they’ll know if you truly pray for them regularly. Are you?
2. Don’t forget them
It’s harder for senders to remember the goers than it is for goers to remember the senders. Your life moves on without them. While they’re busy establishing a new social world, you’re continuing on with the one you’ve always had. Don’t neglect them in the process. They still consider you good friends.
3. Engage them
Don’t just shoot emails to them saying you’re praying for them—as powerful as that is! But engage them. Get to know their world. Tell them about yours. Visit them, if you can. And try to make it so you can.
Prayer means nothing unless you remember them. And they won’t feel remembered unless you engage them.
4. Give to them
Finally, don’t forget to support them financially. One of the hardest things for missionaries to talk about is finances. Partly because nobody enjoys asking for funds and partly because other people react when they talk about it.
But it doesn’t make sense why you can workaholic your way to wealth and have your family within minutes (even after they get married) and missionary families have to send their kids away at eighteen years of age if they’re ever going to have the funds to do anything in life. As a sender, you need to see the fact that they’re in missions with their family as a reason to support them financially.
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If you’re obeying God’s call on your life, you are either on the field already or you’re a sender. As a sender, don’t forget the children of missionary families. Pray for them. Remember them. Engage them. Support them. It means the world to them! And as you do, you are fulfilling the Great Commission.
